Needs Wants Desires

Most Americans don’t know the difference between needs, wants and desires. We honestly
think we “need” our lifestyle. One recent article on the effects of this economy and how horribly some people are hurting, listed such things as “we go out to eat less” “we had to vacation closer to home” and my favorite “poor people can’t afford as much pizza delivery.” We have no concept of reality. I have witnessed this many times, especially with those younger than me. “We need a new house. This 2000’ one is just too small for my wife and I.” Huh??? “We need a new car. This one is THREE YEARS OLD!” and so on.

Here’s the deal: a NEED is whatever is necessary for you to accomplish God’s will in your life. If He has called you to support twelve overseas missionaries, three American churches and a private school then you NEED to be a millionaire. However most of us don’t have that call.

A WANT is something above a need that would make your life nicer or easier. A Desire is something that feeds your pride, the “ultimate.”

You NEED shelter. In the summer this could easily be fulfilled by a tent in the homeless area by the river (actually it is so beautiful down there I am occasionally tempted to join them! Big pasture, shade trees, quiet river, sheltered from the wind and afternoon sun. what a deal! Some of them even have satellite TV!) In the winter, a rent-by-the-month motel will do. You probably WANT a nice house in a middle class neighborhood. You may DESIRE a three story, 5000’ Victorian mansion on twenty acres.

Transportation- you NEED a good pair of walking shoes and a bus pass. You WANT your own, used econo-box. You DESIRE a SUV (with a full tank, LOL) or a Corvette.

Clothes- you NEED what you might find in the dumpster behind a thrift store or at most the clearance rack inside the store. You WANT Wal-mart specials. You DESIRE a wardrobe from “Yuppie Ville.”

Children- NEED some blocks, an old spoon, a pile of dirt, and a pencil and paper. We WANT to give them the same classic toys we had: blocks, paints, dolls, matchbox cars, Tonka trucks, Etch A Sketch, etc. We DESIRE to shower them with all the latest “in” toys and games until they can’t even find their bedroom.

Education- A child NEEDS to read, do math, and know their Bible. We WANT them to know History and Science too. We DESIRE them to have art, music, swimming, and dance lessons plus be the stars on their baseball teams, chess clubs, and 4-H groups, and volunteer at the homeless shelter to boot.

You get the idea.

The sad thing is how many parents today honestly believe the feminist lie that we can- and should- have ALL our desires. Many, many parents today work their tails off to have that ultra nice home, cars, toys, and clothes, when what their children really NEED is MORE TIME.

The truth is you have to make choices. We all make them whether we realize it or not. When you choose that demanding job so you can afford the suburban house you “need” you may very well be harming your children. They would actually be better off in that tent by the river with your full attention. Just think: Parents were created by God, babysitters were created by humans.

Will God have to bring on another “Great Depression” in order for us to “get it”; to understand what is important and that we do have choices?

Now, I do know that some are truly hurting right now. They aren’t who I am talking to. I am talking to those that THINK they are hurting because they can’t go to the Caribbean this year, or eat out for lunch every day, or go to Starbucks. I am talking to the average, everyday, middle class, 20-40 year old in America today.

When you stand before God and He asks you why your child never bonded with anyone (accomplished only with large amounts of time with the same caregiver), thus never learning to love, do you really think He is going to accept “I HAD to have a house because NOBODY can live in an apartment.”??? Honestly, life doesn’t OWE you a middle class existence.

We all need to step back, make a list of our priorities, and change our lives to reflect them. You CAN’T have it all. Something has to suffer. Lifestyle or your children; which will it be?

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