Types of government:

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both cows. The government sells the milk in government stores.

SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes one of them and gives it to your neighbor.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both cows and drafts you.

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

NAZISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and then shoots you.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.

INDUSTRIALISM: You have two cows. You dissect them both and figure out how to build a milk-factory instead.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. To register them, you fill in 17 forms in triplicate. Then the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

LIBERALISM: You have two cows. You sell both to the rich. The government then taxes the rich one cow and gives it to the poor.

PROTECTIONISM: You have two cows. You can't buy a bull from another country.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk

CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

LIBERTARIANISM: Go away. What I do with my cows is none of your business.

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

Just for Fun:

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. The cows decide you have no right to do anything with their milk and leave to form their own society.

COMMUNISM: CUBAN: You no longer have any cows. They sailed to Miami. You still have no milk - but you do have Fidel.

COMMUNISM: "PURE": You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk. Well, maybe the local bully gets more, or a few neighbors band together to kill you so that there is more milk for everyone else.

COMMUNISM: SOVIET: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. Then the government sends you to prison.

COMMUNISM: CAMBODIAN: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

COMMUNISM: CHINESE - MAO STYLE: You have two pigs. The government launches a campaign to convince you to donate them voluntarily to provide meat for workers in the city. The government then declares that people don't need pigs to make pork. Quoting the correct phrases from your little red book, you and your neighbors try to create pork from sheer willpower. Your local party leader reports that you have exceeded all expectations. Your neighbors starve.

SOCIALISM: BUREAUCRATIC: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you should need.

BUREAUCRACY: EUROPEAN UNION: You have two cows. The EU loses one cow, milks the other and then spills the milk.

BUREAUCRACY: UNITED STATES: You have two cows. The government takes both, loses one while moving it to a farm in Puerto Rico and forgets to milk the other.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. A vote is held, and the cows win.

EUROPEAN UNIONISM: You have two goats. The EU declares them to be fruit in order to conform to a rare Belgian custom of making Cow Jam (jam being required to have at least 45% fruit).

EUROPEAN UNIONISM: You have two cows. The EU develops a quota system that limits the gas emissions from flatulent cows. You sell your carbon allotment, not the milk.

REDISTRIBUTIONISM: You have two cows. Everyone should have the same amount of cow. The government takes both cows, cuts them up, and spends more than the cows are worth giving everyone a little piece of cow.

CAPITALISM -- AMERICAN: You have two cows. You sell one of them, and buy a bull. The cow and bull have a great love life; you sell the movie rights to Hollywood. Then you go into real estate.

CAPITALISM -- HONG KONG You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because the feng shui is bad.

The Parable of the talents reapplied

One day God called three families to Him. To one of them He gave ten children. To the next He gave five children. To the third He gave just one child (whether through infertility, miscarriage or early death doesn’t matter. They were only given one child to raise.) He told them to go and raise their children in His culture and education (Ephesians 6)


Later, all three families gathered around His throne. He asked the first family what they did with the children He gave them. They said, “We invested ourselves into our children and made them the top priority in our lives. We sacrificed material wealth so mamma could stay home and homeschool them. We protected them from peer and media influence, though we would have enjoyed more of both ourselves. We made a point of living a righteous life so they would have an example and we followed the Bible’s commands for hubby to love his wife sacrificially and wife to obey and help hubby so they would understand the relationship between God and the church. We carefully researched everything that had to do with their lives, especially their mental and spiritual lives. We taught them not to have a heart of rebellion and the blessings of hard work, and made sure our home was always full of fun and joy. When they became adults, we encouraged them to court instead of casual dating and to stay pure until marriage, guarding their hearts from temptation. After all this hard work, all ten found loving, godly mates, and raised their children the same way. We now give you back our original ten children, their ten mates, and nearly a hundred grandchildren.”

God answered, “Well done though good and faithful servants! It is time for you to enter into your rest. You will be made rulers of a hundred cities.”

He turned to the third couple and asked them the same thing. “God, you only gave us one child. But we took that child and invested ourselves in him. Hubby worked extra hard so wifey could be a volunteer aid at the small private school we sent him too. We were very careful what we allowed him to watch on TV, protecting him from the bad and discussing the marginal and the good. We only exposed him to a very few, well chosen friends who were being raised the same way. When he became an adult we encouraged him to marry his childhood sweetheart and take her to college with him. They became missionaries in the Congo, had five birth children and adopted seven orphans. We present to you our one child, his mate, and their twelve children.”

God answered, “Well done though good and faithful servants! It is time for you to enter into your rest. You will be made rulers of thirty cities (16 for your decedents and another fourteen four those they brought to God that would never have heard the word without your sacrifice of your children and financial support of their work).”

He looked at the second couple; the one with five children. “And what did you do with your children?”

“Well, God. You see, we knew You had written rules to live by, but no one can actually live that way. We sent our children to public school to be witnesses, (even before they were saved). Anyway, we couldn’t afford private school tuition because our house payments were so high. And we couldn’t homeschool because wifey had to work to make the payments on our two new cars. We didn’t discuss what was on TV because they were in their bedrooms and we were in ours. We only let them watch “good” stuff though. They made lots of friends we didn’t really like, but maybe our children were good influences on them. We didn’t let them date until a full year after their peers were dating. One of our boys got his girlfriend pregnant and we talked them into giving the baby up for adoption instead of getting an abortion. That’s good, isn’t it? We made sure they all knew about birth-control and where to get it, but that we didn’t really think it a good idea to have sex before they married. Or at least went to college. They all got married. Well three of them did divorce. Two of them twice. We have seven grandkids in all. We take them to church with us when we can, but four of them are not in our children’s custody, so that is not very often. Two have given their hearts to you and are trying to live right, but it’s difficult since their parents don’t really live right. We don’t know what happened. We raised them in church. Well, most Sundays anyway. I guess the Sunday school teachers and Youth Ministers messed up. So, God, here are the two of our decedents that love you.”

“You evil and idolatrous people! You knew I had laws to live by but you flat ignored them! You lost the ones I gave you to protect! Take away their children and put them under the influence of the first couple and take these people and toss them in hell for disobedience!

“To him who has, will much be given. From him who has not, will that which he does have be taken.”

What is Natural Family planning?

A woman is only fertile 3-10 days per month. I guarantee that when any birth control method failed, it failed on the days she was fertile. You can't get pregnant when you are not fertile. Period.

The key, then, is to know when you are fertile.

It actually takes more than a sperm and an egg to make a baby. The sperm must get TO the egg. The woman's vagina is high in acid. Acid kills sperm. Also, the cervix is closed tight most of the month. But once per month, the cervix softens and opens up. At the same time, the body produces a clear mucus (about the consistency of a raw egg white), that is alkaline (neutralizes the acid) and is high in glucose (to nourish the sperm). It also has channels for the sperm to swim up.

Then the progesterone that causes you to release an egg also causes your temperature to go up half a degree. If you take your temperature (orally with a digital thermometer works fine) first thing every morning before you get up, drink or eat anything, and record it, you will see this happen. That means you have ovulated. The mucus will stop when you ovulate. It takes a few days for it to all go away and an egg is only viable for three days. So three days after you ovulate, you are no longer fertile.

So, if you want to get pregnant, enjoy your mate's companionship while you have mucus showing up to three days after it stops and your temprature raises. (Note, if you have been using a hormonal means of birth control, it may take a year or more for you to begin to ovulate again.)

If you do not want to get pregnant, avoid intercourse during these days. It is that simple.

Benefits:
· 100% natural.
· No chemicals.
· No side effects.
· It is FREE.
· It increases communication between partners.
· It is instantly reversible.
· It leaves things open for God to work.

How effective is Natural Family Planning?

For achieving pregnancy, I have read about one doctor, (who was a fertility specialist), having a conversion to Catholicism, a religion that forbids chemical or mechanical intervention in fertility even in getting pregnant. After her conversion, she began teaching her patients this method and had far better success than she had had with modern pills and procedures.

For preventing pregnancy; clinical trials have shown it to be as effective as the pill; 98%. In everyday practice, it is as effective as the condom; 89%. This is due to its being instantly reversible, not because of any flaw in the method itself. In other words, no one is getting pregnant while faithfully adhering to the method. They are getting pregnant because they decide to risk a pregnancy during their fertile time.

I have only hit the highlights here. There is a great deal more that can be learned about fertility. For more information, check your local library for "Your Fertility Signals."Or contact the Couple to Couple League

Debt, The Bible and C-sections

I suppose I could come up with a way to relate those three things, but I really just wanted to share these links.

First, a funny video from Generation Cedar with a guaranteed solution to debt. This applies to the nation as well.
Don’t Buy Stuff You Can’t Afford


The swordsman, a parable...
Too true.

Pit to Distress": Your Ticket to an "Emergency" Cesarean?
Now this is just plain evil!!!

A Quote About Women

"This opinion is not peculiar to one sex and contested by the other; I never observed that the women of America consider conjugal authority as a fortunate usurpation of their rights, or that they thought themselves degraded by submitting to it. It appeared to me, on the contrary, that they attach a sort of pride to the voluntary surrender of their own will and make it their boast to bend themselves to the yoke, not to shake it off.....as the Americans can conceive nothing more precious than a woman's honor and nothing which ought so much to be respected as her independence, they hold that no punishment is too severe for the man who deprives her of them against her will.....Thus the Americans do not think that man and woman have either the duty or the right to perform the same offices, but they show an equal regard for both their respective parts; and though their lot is different, they consider both of them as beings of equal value. They do not give to the courage of woman the same form or the same direction as to that of man, but they never doubt her courage; and if they hold that man and his partner ought not always to exercise their intellect and understanding in the same manner, they at least believe the understanding of the one to be as sound as that of the other, and her intellect to be as clear.”As for myself, I do not hesitate to avow that although the women of the United States are confined within the narrow circle of domestic life, and their situation is in some respects one of extreme dependence, I have nowhere seen woman occupying a loftier position; and if I were asked, now that I am drawing to the close of this work, in which I have spoken of so many important things done by the Americans, to what the singular prosperity and growing strength of that people ought mainly to be attributed, I should reply: To the superiority of their women."

From the 1800’s.

My, we’ve come a long way, baby. All the way to “equality.” If we were “superior” before and now we are equal, we have come a loooong way…



Down.

Babies, Schools and unemployment

Our views of children are skewed from pre-birth tight through school.

The inevitable change of the abortion debate.
The whole debate is between those that think every life is precious and those who think humans are no more than animals and are just as expendable.

Population Control Through Tetanus Vaccine
This is very scary! But I am only surprised it is so long in coming.


Epiphany
Want an end to the unemployment crisis? Want to instantly raise wages? Want to virtually end juvenile delinquency, learning disabilities, ADHD, and a whole host of other problems? Guess what? Mommies ARE important!


Did Public Schools Make America Great?
Or are we great INSPITE OF public schools?

Marriage is about the human heart.

The human heart is in rebellion to God.

Many who are for gay marriage are assuming sexual orientation is genetic. It is not. The research that is supposed to have shown this is VERY poorly done. The studies are not scientifically valid. I can give you links to sites that take them apart piece by piece and explain the problems with them (you would be amazed how much of our lives are affected by very bad science. Did you know there is no link between eating fat and heart disease? Sugar and heart disease, yes. Man made trans fats and heart disease, yes. Butter, whole milk and good ole’ meat NO! And vaccines? Iffy at best. Sigh.) The gay marriage issue is in no way related to the racial bigotry and to compare them is to diminish the entire issue of racial prejudice and to demean those who fought it.

The fact is that gay couples already have all the same rights as married couples under Domestic Partnership Laws. What they are campaigning for is a name, nothing more. And if heterosexual marriage is in such bad shape, why would gays want to be identified with it anyway?

The fact is that marriage is not an invention of humankind. It is an invention of God’s. He designed it for the purpose of 1) creating godly children, something no gay couple can do without outside help, and 2) representing Christ and the church. Now how does a gay marriage do this? Wouldn’t this show us that God doesn’t need the church, just another God? or the church doesn’t need God just a sister church to fellowship with? This is totally ridiculous and total blaspheme.

Where will this lead? Do we next give men who have the urge to have sex with little boys the legal right to marry them? There are those who say this is as much a part of their genetic make up as the gays are claiming. How about those attracted to animals? Do we give them the right to marry their dogs? Give me one good argument to restrict these practices without using the same arguments heterosexuals use against gay marriage.

The fact is that marriage is none of the government’s business in the first place. They have no right telling anyone anything about marriage. It is a religious institution. I don’t even think they should issue marriage licenses (though I haven’t figured out how to get around inheritance problems without it:-)

And these laws do affect the none gay person. For example, landlords have the legal right to deny those shacking up an apartment under their religious freedoms. Legalization of gay marriage forces them to rent to gays even if they believe they would go to hell for it (while the gay couple can always pick another apartment. They have the right to choose, but the landlord doesn’t). It also forces churches to hire gay Sunday school teachers and office help against their sincerely held religious beliefs, or risk law suits or even prison.

“Do unto others…” I am not advocating stoning gays, as the Old Testament tells us to do. Far from it. I do not advocate any violence against gays. What I ask my country and fellow Americans to do to me is to leave me alone and allow me to worship my God in the way He has called me to. Passage of these laws removes that freedom and gets the average gay couple nothing more than identification with a very troubled, sick institution. It is one more step to telling me what to teach in my homeschool or outlawing homeschooling all together. It is one more step to imprisoning my hubby and father for what they preach from the pulpit. With the anti-discrimination laws on the books (that Act Up fully intends to use to the fullest extent) it will complete the transformation of this country into a religious dictatorship with Atheism as the religion. Anyone worshiping in any none approved way would be labeled a bigot to someone.

Remember, when you approve of the government taking my rights, you are giving them the right to take yours.