Tuesday, September 15, 2009

I Can't Afford To Stay Home.

I once got a dog to guard my house. He decided to take to the life of roaming the neighborhood. No matter what we did we could not keep him at home. We ended up getting rid of him because we saw no good in feeding a guard dog that was never home to guard the house.

A woman who is not home can not "guard," the home any more than that dog could.

“The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:3

Have you ever realized those last words are there? I didn't until I read Debi Pearl's excellent book, Created to be His Help Meet.

The scripture says for older women to teach younger women to be keepers at home so God's word is not blasphemed! Women NOT keeping home blasphemes the Bible. OUCH!

It doesn't say for the aged women to teach the domestically inclined to be keepers at home. It doesn't say for the aged women to teach those that want to to be, to be keepers at home. It doesn't even say for them to teach those with small children to be keepers at home. It says for the aged women to teach the younger women-period- to be keepers at home.

I have heard women say that they are working outside the home so that if their husbands were killed, disabled, or left them they would have a way to support themselves. This doesn't make sense. "I am getting a job today and putting my child into inferior daycare (any care that is less than mommy care is inferior) so that should my husband die or leave a year, or five, or twenty from now I will have a job."

What? This makes no sense. Why not use the benefit today of having a husband to support you to care for your child while trusting that should the unimaginable happen, God will give you a job then? If you have real reason to believe that you will loose your husband early (illness, dangerous job, strange women calling and asking for his clothes sizes, etc.) then focus on finding and building a home business now while you have resources to live on and care for your own children yourself. Even if you can't start a home business, you will be better off financially if you loose your hubby if you are already used to living on one income. If you are in the habit of having two incomes and he dies on you, you have NO WAY to earn more money. You are stuck and will likely loose your home soon after loosing you soul-mate. If you are used to living on one income and you loose hubby, you can get a job and at least have a shot at keeping your home. And you won't have to lower your standard of living nearly as much. Truth be told, the best resource you can invest in for your future is your children anyway. If you care for them now they will care for you later. Studies have shown that the better your children do in this life the better retirement you will have.

Studies have also shown that two income families are more likely to divorce than mom-at-home families. So staying home may be one thing that you can do make sure you never BECOME a single parent.

I have also heard the excuse "We can't afford for me not to work." Poppycock. If you are living in a one room studio apartment, over a convenience store, with five children, and your husband walks to work because you do not have a car, but have running water, flush toilets, heat of some kind, clothes on your backs and food in your mouths, then you are still way ahead of most of the planet. You are still very blessed materially. If you have more than that, you are RICH and are working in order to maintain your standard of living, not to survive. You do not NEED a three bedroom house in the suburbs with three cars, computer, fashionable clothes and fast food on the corner. These are wants, not needs. (Note here- I live in a three bedroom home in the 'burbs. God has blessed us with the resources to afford this even on only one income, though we have lived in far less circumstances. I believe God has rewarded us for our faithfulness to His word.) If your family really valued your womanhood, (the part created in the image of God, not the part you are trying to create in the image of man), they would not mind lowering their standard of living. What is more important? A big fancy house or the best care in the world for your children? Fashionable clothes or nourishing food? Toys galore or a Real Home? This is the richest country the world has EVER seen. Bottom line...Any healthy American couple that really wants Mamma home can find a way to afford it.

Now, if anyone is still reading after that very harsh paragraph, the fact is that it costs money to work (daycare, work and school clothes, convenience foods, additional taxes, extra car expenses, extra gas, office parties and gifts, etc). Many, many women have set down and figured out how much it costs and discovered their families would be ahead if they quit. Many others discovered that they were only actually brining home a few hundred dollars above what work was costing and felt it more than worth it to "tighten the belt" a little. Still others have stepped out on faith and gone ahead and quit work trusting God to supply. Within a short time, their husband would get a job or promotion earning the same or even MORE than they were earning together before. Others of us, He has given a double dose of creativity to learn how to live very cheaply and/or make up the difference with work at home.

The thing is, if we obey God, He will supply. We probably can't see how He will, but He will. If you stand on faith that He has said in His word that a woman has more important things to do than to earn mere money, He will provide for all your needs through His riches in glory.

“Be not ye therefore like unto them: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him.” Matthew 6:8

“Hitherto have ye asked nothing in my name: ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full.” John 16:24

“The aged women ...teach the young women to be ...keepers at home... that the word of God be not blasphemed.”

How much do you really need to live?

stay-at-home-mom, life, Bible,

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you so much for commenting! I love to talk to my readers.

I do ask that there be no anonymous commenters, though. If I am brave enough to put my name on this blog, you should be too:-)

Please keep it civil. Remember we are all human and make mistakes, and that since we can't see each other's faces or hear each other's tone of voice, it is very hard to get the emotion in what we are saying each other. Use lots of emoticons! :-) And show grace and love to each other.