We are told that the reason for marriage is love, companionship, sex, reproduction, social contract and I don’t know what all. Our society has built its laws on these presumptions.
To bad they aren’t true.
First of all, marriage is not something that “evolved” to meet the needs of humans. It was not created by men to keep their women to themselves nor by women to make sure they had the financial support necessary to raise children.
Marriage is the invention of God Himself on the sixth day of creation.
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
This whole thing was God’s idea. He invented it. He decided the rules for it. And He created its purpose.
What is the purpose of marriage?
The Bible repeatedly compares God’s relationship with His people to the relationship between husband and wife.
“For as a young man marries a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.” Isa 62:5
“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” Ephesians 5:31-32
“And there came unto me one of the seven angels which had the seven vials full of the seven last plagues, and talked with me, saying, Come hither, I will show thee the bride, the Lamb's wife.” Rev 21:9
The above is just a sample of the scriptures referring to the bride of Christ and the marriage supper of The Lamb. The fact is that God’s people have always been God’s bride. He divorced Israel for unfaithfulness and has married the Christian church.
How do we know what it means, as a church body, to be the bride of Christ? We look at the example God gave us- human marriage. How do we know what human marriage is supposed to be? God gave us explicit rules in His word.
The biblical rules for marriage have the man as the head of the household, loving his wife enough to die for her. Christ loved us enough to choose to go to the cross to die for us, something he didn’t want to do (read the prayer in the garden before the crucifixion) but chose to anyway.
It has the woman as the helper to her husband, submitting and obeying him. The church is God’s helper in this world, submitting to His will and obeying His plans. When a husband and wife love on each other, the family increases in size. When the church loves on God (who, much like most men, is always ready to love on His wife right back;-) the church grows. This is a beautiful parallel; a wonderful object lesson.
Now, let’s examine a few modern “improvements” on marriage:
It is now popular to have an egalitarian marriage; a marriage where no one is supposed to be boss, but man and woman are equal partners making equal decisions. The man and wife both have jobs outside the home, generally, and both jobs and career goals are supposed to be given equal weight in the family. Now how does this play out in the Great Heavenly Marriage? God and the church both have their separate but equal jobs to do. Neither is more important than the other. Neither God nor the church has the right to boss the other around. They make all decisions equally.
Can you picture this? Unfortunately, I can. I see many churches that think their ideas on how to minister to the lost and the community are just as good as the ones God gave us. Sadly, though, it doesn’t work. We will only be successful churches when we submit to God and obey Him as the wife is SUPPOSED to obey her husband. And wives, your family won’t work right if you don’t submit to hubby with the same attitude the church should submit to God!
Dictatorship. I have to add this one because many women think any marriage that isn’t egalitarian is a dictatorship. This is simply not true. A dictatorship is where the head of the house puts his ideas and interests supreme, above everyone else’s. So what if his ideas inconvenience everyone else? It’s HIS house isn’t it? If he has to force (physically or emotionally, like with pouting) his wife to obey, than, well, he will! Question is, though, is this how Christ acts? Does Christ make decisions that are bad for the church? No! Actually, all of Christ’s decisions are made with what is best for the church in the forefront. Everything He does is for the benefit of the church. This is how hubby is supposed to act; everything he does is supposed to be for the benefit of wifey and the family.
Polygamy. Well this idea is out! The Bible is plain that God only has one church, one bride. Polygamy gives a man two brides. Two brides compete for hubby’s attention; they are rivals. If this was a valid marriage format, than different churches would have to compete for God’s attention. Jesus said He wanted us to be one, a doctrine also taught throughout the New Testament. All that are saved are part of the One Church; the One Bride of Christ. Polygamy gives a false picture, and though not outlawed in the bible, it is discouraged and there is not one example that I know of, of a polygamous marriage that is not a dysfunctional home.
Gay marriage. So, God doesn’t really need the church? He just needs to find another God to pal around with? Or the church doesn’t need God? She just needs to find another church to fellowship and not deal with Jesus at all? Can God bring sinners to Him without human voices (the church) to do the preaching? Can the church save souls without Christ? Does this even make sense to anyone?
The childless or child restricted marriage. Let’s imagine this in the form of the church; “Let’s not let anyone new come to our congregation. They just cost money and take work. We can buy a bigger building and fancier choir robes if we don’t have the expense of evangelism. We can have lots of fun with Jesus without winning souls. Besides, we have goals and jobs to do and just don’t have time to teach new converts or to deal with them.”
Or let’s picture Jesus saying “I don’t want anymore converts. I had planned on quitting my work early and just enjoying myself. New converts would mean I would have to keep saving people for many more years to come and I just don’t want to do that.” This is as ridiculous as gay marriage.
Divorce. “Sorry Jesus. I found a new God who turns me on more. I just don’t love You anymore.” Sadly, this is as common as physical divorce.
We need to examine our marriages and bring them into line with the word of God; with His design. To do any differently is to say we know better than He does what is right and brings shame on the Kingdom of God.
(Oh, and is love, companionship, and especially sex are really nice fringe benefits of marriage! God built it that way!)
To bad they aren’t true.
First of all, marriage is not something that “evolved” to meet the needs of humans. It was not created by men to keep their women to themselves nor by women to make sure they had the financial support necessary to raise children.
Marriage is the invention of God Himself on the sixth day of creation.
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”
This whole thing was God’s idea. He invented it. He decided the rules for it. And He created its purpose.
What is the purpose of marriage?
The Bible repeatedly compares God’s relationship with His people to the relationship between husband and wife.
“For as a young man marries a virgin, so shall thy sons marry thee: and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall thy God rejoice over thee.” Isa 62:5
“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” Ephesians 5:31-32
“And there came unto me one of the seven angels which had the seven vials full of the seven last plagues, and talked with me, saying, Come hither, I will show thee the bride, the Lamb's wife.” Rev 21:9
The above is just a sample of the scriptures referring to the bride of Christ and the marriage supper of The Lamb. The fact is that God’s people have always been God’s bride. He divorced Israel for unfaithfulness and has married the Christian church.
How do we know what it means, as a church body, to be the bride of Christ? We look at the example God gave us- human marriage. How do we know what human marriage is supposed to be? God gave us explicit rules in His word.
The biblical rules for marriage have the man as the head of the household, loving his wife enough to die for her. Christ loved us enough to choose to go to the cross to die for us, something he didn’t want to do (read the prayer in the garden before the crucifixion) but chose to anyway.
It has the woman as the helper to her husband, submitting and obeying him. The church is God’s helper in this world, submitting to His will and obeying His plans. When a husband and wife love on each other, the family increases in size. When the church loves on God (who, much like most men, is always ready to love on His wife right back;-) the church grows. This is a beautiful parallel; a wonderful object lesson.
Now, let’s examine a few modern “improvements” on marriage:
It is now popular to have an egalitarian marriage; a marriage where no one is supposed to be boss, but man and woman are equal partners making equal decisions. The man and wife both have jobs outside the home, generally, and both jobs and career goals are supposed to be given equal weight in the family. Now how does this play out in the Great Heavenly Marriage? God and the church both have their separate but equal jobs to do. Neither is more important than the other. Neither God nor the church has the right to boss the other around. They make all decisions equally.
Can you picture this? Unfortunately, I can. I see many churches that think their ideas on how to minister to the lost and the community are just as good as the ones God gave us. Sadly, though, it doesn’t work. We will only be successful churches when we submit to God and obey Him as the wife is SUPPOSED to obey her husband. And wives, your family won’t work right if you don’t submit to hubby with the same attitude the church should submit to God!
Dictatorship. I have to add this one because many women think any marriage that isn’t egalitarian is a dictatorship. This is simply not true. A dictatorship is where the head of the house puts his ideas and interests supreme, above everyone else’s. So what if his ideas inconvenience everyone else? It’s HIS house isn’t it? If he has to force (physically or emotionally, like with pouting) his wife to obey, than, well, he will! Question is, though, is this how Christ acts? Does Christ make decisions that are bad for the church? No! Actually, all of Christ’s decisions are made with what is best for the church in the forefront. Everything He does is for the benefit of the church. This is how hubby is supposed to act; everything he does is supposed to be for the benefit of wifey and the family.
Polygamy. Well this idea is out! The Bible is plain that God only has one church, one bride. Polygamy gives a man two brides. Two brides compete for hubby’s attention; they are rivals. If this was a valid marriage format, than different churches would have to compete for God’s attention. Jesus said He wanted us to be one, a doctrine also taught throughout the New Testament. All that are saved are part of the One Church; the One Bride of Christ. Polygamy gives a false picture, and though not outlawed in the bible, it is discouraged and there is not one example that I know of, of a polygamous marriage that is not a dysfunctional home.
Gay marriage. So, God doesn’t really need the church? He just needs to find another God to pal around with? Or the church doesn’t need God? She just needs to find another church to fellowship and not deal with Jesus at all? Can God bring sinners to Him without human voices (the church) to do the preaching? Can the church save souls without Christ? Does this even make sense to anyone?
The childless or child restricted marriage. Let’s imagine this in the form of the church; “Let’s not let anyone new come to our congregation. They just cost money and take work. We can buy a bigger building and fancier choir robes if we don’t have the expense of evangelism. We can have lots of fun with Jesus without winning souls. Besides, we have goals and jobs to do and just don’t have time to teach new converts or to deal with them.”
Or let’s picture Jesus saying “I don’t want anymore converts. I had planned on quitting my work early and just enjoying myself. New converts would mean I would have to keep saving people for many more years to come and I just don’t want to do that.” This is as ridiculous as gay marriage.
Divorce. “Sorry Jesus. I found a new God who turns me on more. I just don’t love You anymore.” Sadly, this is as common as physical divorce.
We need to examine our marriages and bring them into line with the word of God; with His design. To do any differently is to say we know better than He does what is right and brings shame on the Kingdom of God.
(Oh, and is love, companionship, and especially sex are really nice fringe benefits of marriage! God built it that way!)
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